Comfort Path

About

This is my third and final attempt to write this story (I doubt I will ever write about it again). I wrote and recorded this version in one evening, in only one or two takes, if memory serves. I spent a lot of sleepless nights deciding whether I was ready to release this into the world, but I knew that there would be other masc people with similar experiences who might need the reassurance that they are not alone, their experiences are real, their feelings are valid, and this is not the end.

I refuse to let this experience define me or hinder me in anyway. Instead, I have chosen to accept it, grow from it, and vow to end the cycle.

Lyrics

An expansive house,
On a blissful night.
Didn’t know it could ever happen to me.

Hadn’t asked for it,
Never gave him a sign.
I will never forget those ceiling tiles,
Until I rest for good.

His tightening grip,
Ensnaring me.
My helpless little bones couldn’t bear that weight.

In a crowded room,
Had I thought to scream,
They might not have turned their backs on me,
But boys will be boys I guess.

Is my memory,
Playing tricks on me?
It’s been seven years, now I doubt myself.

My closest friends,
My comfort path,
Have given me a chance to heal.

I will never forget his scent on me.
I will never forget his hands on me.
I will never forget him laugh at me.
And I will never forget those ceiling tiles.

But now I can love.

Credits

Performance: Cynabel
Songwriting: Ben Schenerman
Production: Ben Schenerman Mastering: 92elm (Joe Haderle)